A Thousand Sleepless Nights
by Makkenna Witwicky
Summary: Magnus and Alec aren't coping well with being apart. They can't sleep, and when they do, they have nightmares. At this rate, they'll both have a thousand sleepless nights. Magnus/Alec. Malec. *Takes place after City of Lost Souls.


**I have wanted to right a Mortal Instruments fic for a while. I wanted to wait until I finished City of Lost Souls, though. I finally finished Thursday. Magnus and Alec are my two favorite characters, so I had to do a Malec. Hope you guys enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing. Cassandra Clare owns it all..**

**Magnus Bane**

His fingers gripped the bright purple bed sheets. Sweat beaded his head as muffled words attempted to leave his throat. He tossed and turned, struggling to get away from something that wasn't truly there. Finally Magnus awoke.

He shot up, releasing his death grip on the sheets. He wiped the sweat from his forehead with the back of his arm, on his silk pajama sleeve.

He sighed, leaning his head into his hands and then running his long fingers through his hair.

It it were a normal situation, the shabby flatness of the black strands would have annoyed him, but now he couldn't care less.

He glanced over to the left side of the bed, where not two weeks ago Alec would lay with him. He could get comfort from his nightmare with a kiss or a hug or just hearing his voice. Anything.

He couldn't do any of that, though. He had broken up with Alec two weeks ago and he surely hated him.

Magnus had good reasons for what he did but he still felt the loss. Wished he hadn't had to do it. Alec was wrong, though. No matter how much he loved Alec, he had betrayed him.

Just thinking about the fact that Alec contemplated shortening his life for his own selfish reasons made Magnus' chest ache and tears come to his cat eyes.

He had had many lovers in his time. Some had treated him poorly and other well. He had lost some and sent some away, but none of these goodbyes and betrayals hurt as much as this one.

Magnus never dreamed someone like Alec would come into his life. Someone he truly loved and would wish to be with forever. Someone he actually felt that connection with.

The one.

It was his fault, Magnus believed. He grabbed a spare pillow, throwing it roughly against the wall.

He to this day couldn't believe he had allowed himself to let Alec get to him this way. Why had he allowed his affections to reside so strongly for someone he couldn't be with for his whole lifetime?

Sure, he would have given up his immortality for Alec in a heartbeat, it just wasn't Alec's decision to make if he did this or not.

That was the problem.

He wanted to the book of white to find a spell to make this a reality. To be normal again and be with Alec. He planed to surprise him, maybe. If he found a spell, that is.

Alec just had to be selfish!

Magnus threw another pillow across the room let out a groan.

Magnus had seen selfishness in his time. A lot of it. There were rude selfish people who were selfish because of how highly they though of themselves. Then, there were people who were selfish because of something they desired. Finally. There were people who were selfish because they thought it was the right thing to do.

Magnus couldn't place Alec in any of these categories, not sure which one he would fit in. He would never had thought to place Alec in the first one, having thought he knew him well enough to know he wasn't a conceited person, but after finding out what Alec thought about doing, (which he never thought Alec would do) he realized he may not know him as well as he thought.

Magnus let out another groan. All he did was think about Alec. The night before, he woke up at two in the morning, and he lied awake, wondering if Alec though of him, too. If he had nightmares like he did or if he slept at night. He thought until he wondered if Alec was torn up by this at all.

He knew he was, though. Alec almost begged him for another chance that night it all went down.

Magnus glanced over at the clock, it reading one-thirty AM.

He needed sleep. Badly.

He let himself fall into the maters again, tugging the comforter onto him again. He let his eyes slide shut. He fell into sleep again, hoping the nightmares were over for the night.

Maybe he wouldn't have to watch Alec die again.

**Alec Lightwood**

Alec sat on his bed at the institute and looked out the window. The moon was full and the stars shone out.

It was loud outside, yet peaceful. The kind of realistic that was being used to the sounds of New York.

Alec couldn't sleep. His mind races every moment of each day about Magnus.

What was he doing?

Was he as distraught as he was?

Where was he?

Was he doing this, too?

Did he miss him?

Of course, Alec missed Magnus for the both of them.

He missed everything. He also missed sleep. He couldn't sleep, not only because he missed the Warlock he loved, but also the familiarity of a Magnus' bed, being held by him as he slept. All of it .

As Alec sat in his old room at the institute, he never had felt so alone. The room had never felt so empty and cold.

Alec leaned back, his head resting on the pillow. He was exhausted. He should sleep but the nightmares...

He couldn't worry about that now, he was already out.

He was thrown into a dream. The same one he always had. It was Magnus, holding a dagger. He started straight into Alec's soul and Alec couldn't look away.

He also couldn't move or speak.

He watched once again as Magnus gave him a defeated smile. "I love you." He whispered. "I can't live for eternity without you, but I can't live with you either." He drove the dagger into his Chest to the hilt. Blood sprayed out and he fell to his knees.

Alec shot up, covered in sweat. He had this dream every night and he could only hope Magnus didn't have this dream about him.

The only thing is. If he did have them, they way would be accurate. Alec wished he could kill himself because without Magnus, he was dead inside anyways.

**Kind of sucky. I'm sorry. I wanted to do an angsty Malec short. Review for me what you thought! Please?**


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